We arrived at the hotel this afternoon and Sadie is so excited. She has not taken a single step without a jump included. We could not change and head to the pool fast enough for her. She was so impressed with the incredible kiddie pool, the water slides and amazing toys. Even the menu for lunch by the pool was incredible for kids. We feel beyond blessed and came back to our room excited to run to the grocery store for some snacks. When we arrived, a hotel employee was standing at our door about to deliver some cupcakes, snacks and drinks from the hotel manager. Once again, I was so touched and Sadie lit up and has been happily dancing around our room with her cupcake in hand. I look forward to writing them a note when I leave, as this is an amazing gift to our family and, although losing Hope has been horrible, we have felt so much love and find the strength to get through each day.
As we sat by the pool today and I saw all the families there with their children, I wondered if they knew how blessed they were. Did they realize that life is unpredictable and there are no guarantees? Were they enjoying the smiles from their children and the time they were able to spend with them? I find that in some moments I am so happy to be with Sadie and soak in the opportunity to spend time with her. At other times I feel broken and struggle to be a mom when I feel like having a shower so I can sit on the floor and cry in the bathroom.
We continue to feel that people are praying us through this tragedy. We still look at pictures of Hope often in the day, notice every heart that someone is wearing and long to hold her again. I continue to pray that her life, short as it was, will greatly impact the kingdom and give some purpose to our pain.
Hope, I wish you were splashing next to your sister. At the same time, I am jealous that you are face to face with Jesus. That thought makes it easier for me to smile, even though you're no longer here.